Trust Yourself. It’s The Only Way To Trust Anyone Else.

by Dian Reid-Jancic· Follow Dian on

I go to the local tire shop to replace the tires on one of our vehicles. As I walk into the shop, a man, we’ll call him Don, is inquiring about jumper cables the tire shop does not sell. I offer to help locate a store that sells jumper cables nearby, but there are none within walking distance.

Trust yourself and the rest will fall into placeI silently size Don up and decide to trust my gut. I proceed to postpone my tire replacement to drive him a mile back to his car and give his car a jump start. Easy peasy.

Don starts his car, gets out and closes the door behind him. With the car running. And the keys in the ignition. And the car door locked. Not so easy peasy.

While I look through my car to see if I have a wire hanger or something that might help him jimmy the lock open, Don paces around his car, looking for a window or door he might have left cracked before he walked the mile in search of jumper cables. I have nothing to help with the lock and his car is sealed up tight. Don is beside himself.

Through short conversation I learn that he’s recently been honorably discharged from the Army and is awaiting benefits to kick in. He left his family back in the midwest to come out to California for a fresh start. He’d stayed with friends, but with their two kids and not enough space, he decided sleeping in his car is a better alternative until he can find a job and get back on his feet. He doesn’t want to be a burden, nor live amongst—or add to—a house of chaos.

Before Don can object, I call Roadside Assistance to come unlock his car. My shiny new tires can certainly wait until this man can get back into his temporary house. I then take the opportunity to get to know Don a little better.

He seems like a guy who just needs to be heard, so I just listen as he talks for nearly 20 minutes while we wait for assistance to arrive.  He’d been in the Army for four years and is finally ready to begin living his life on his terms; it’s turning out to be much more of a struggle than he’s anticipated.

As he tells me his story it occurs to me how lucky I am to have walked into the tire store at the exact moment he asked for help. Not only do I get to help him jump start and unlock his car (and house, as it were), but I get to be a witness to this man’s dedication to life.

How often do we get to meet people who are so driven to create change in their lives that they drop everything they know on one side of the country and trust themselves that everything will work out on the other side?

::

I could have either distrusted or ignored this man in need of a good deed; instead, I trusted my gut. And still, my trust wasn’t about him. Trust isn’t about anyone but me. I’ve got to know myself enough to trust myself, otherwise there’s no trusting anyone else.

This doesn’t mean I trust everyone who asks for help; I do live in reality. It simply means that I respect the trust I’ve cultivated between my sense of doing good and my gut feelings.

Trust is something you must have with yourself before you have it with anyone else. 

I feel truly honored and blessed to have happened upon this man who reminded me that trust is a good thing.

Cheers to you, Don, for that reminder. I trust you’re living well and trusting your intuition on whatever your next move is.

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