Self-Care and Just There

by Dian Reid-Jancic· Follow Dian on

Have you ever gone outside and felt like the air was just…there? Not hot. Not cold. Just. There. It’s an amazing feeling. A few mornings ago I felt mellow. I felt really grounded in my being, but I wondered if something was missing because I didn’t feel the fire. I didn’t feel the WOW! POW! BANG! ZOOM! ENERGY! of being excited to get to my work for the day.

I felt mellow. And I wanted to know if I felt okay with that.

Turns out, I felt my passion all around me, but it wasn’t hot, it wasn’t cold, it was just…there.

And it felt kind of amazing.

Upon this realization, I still had 10 more minutes in my call with my coach, and had a thought I just couldn’t keep in: “I want to be more like my dog.” The conversation went something like this:

Me: Okay, this might sound silly but I really want to be more like my dog.
Coach: Okay…so what does that mean to you?
Me: Well he just does whatever he feels like…he’s the epitome of self care!
Coach: And how do you want your self care to be more like Jackson’s?
Me: I don’t mean being able to sleep all day for energy to run around like a crazy dog every time he poops. I mean…every time he gets up from a nap or just gets up off the couch, he stretches. He NEVER forgets. It’s just in his nature to take care of himself that way.

As the conversation went on, it came out that what I want is to have self care simply be second nature—first nature—to me. I’ve done well lately with taking care of myself on a weekly basis. I run 2-3 times a week. I meditate 3-4 times a week. I eat breakfast every day before 9AM (this is a BIG deal for me). Now I want to take my self-care to another level.

I want my self-care to come naturally, without having to think about it. What’s important to me is not just taking care of myself on a weekly basis, but a daily—no…a consistent daily basis. What I really want is to not have to think about it.

I can set reminders for myself up the wazoo on my desktop calendar that syncs with Google calendars that syncs with my Blackberry, and all it takes is hitting “dismiss” for all the reminders to go away and disappear from my thoughts for the rest of the day (or eternity, if I please).

It’s not about having the right “tools” to take care of myself. I have those. What I need is the motivation to actually use those tools. What I need is to have an a-ha! moment to have my motivation anchored into my being. What I need is…you know what, I don’t need anything.

A-HA!!

I go back to it not being about the tools, but it being about me. What I have is an intense desire—some might call this Intention—to take care of myself. I don’t just see the benefit of stretching every morning, whether I’m running or not, I understand it at my core. I don’t just know the details and see how one act affects many down the line in my life, I feel it in my bones, my body, my soul. I get it. My motivation, very simply, just…exists. All I need to do is look for it.

I don’t need to look outside myself for tools or gimmicks or tips or tricks. I simply need to look inside myself and see what’s there. What do I find? I find my self care. And you know what?

It’s just…there.

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