My Yes And No Story

by Dian Reid-Jancic· Follow Dian on

When you say yes to one thing, you’re usually saying no to more than one thing. And by saying yes to that one thing, you’re probably saying yes to a whole slew of things you didn’t even realize. But I’m getting ahead of myself…let’s go back to saying yes. What are you saying yes to?

I’m a beer connoisseur. Have been for going on ten years now. Until I stopped drinking it all together a few months ago.
A few months ago I was saying yes to beer. And yes to a lot of other things. Yes to headaches in the morning (if I didn’t drink enough water the day/night before). Yes to feeling foggy-headed for most of the day, even if just slightly. Yes to chips at my bank account to pay for my love and taste. Yes to 150+ calories per beer, depending on ale versus pilsner versus bock versus lager versus [any other kind/type of beer]. And by saying yes to all those calories, I was also saying yes to about 15lbs of extra weight. I know this because as soon as I said no to beer, the next couple of months saw those 15lbs shed without much additional effort.

But I’m getting ahead of myself again. In the beginning, I had pangs of missing it. I mean, really missing it. I didn’t miss the buzz of having had a beer though, I just missed the taste. It was difficult for me to say no in the beginning because I couldn’t remember what I was saying yes to. I went back and forth with my coach for a couple of months trying to figure out a way to be healthy without giving up my taste of beer. What I finally settled on was taking it slow.

I began with small steps. First, no beer during the day (before 5PM). Then, no beer before Erin got home (sometimes MUCH later than 5PM). Then, no beer at all during the week, except Friday nights. Then, no beer on days before I work (yep, I have clients on Saturdays). Then, no beer at all. I had to make it a gradual transition. I sensed about myself, this was the only way to really get why I was doing it. And it was slow enough to actually see the results happen before my eyes. I’d stopped looking at giving up beer as losing something, and began to look at it as gaining my health.

Once I had the awareness in my brain that by saying yes to beer, I was saying yes to those 15lbs and knee/back problems due to the extra weight—and the horrible self-loathing thoughts that popped in my head every time I saw myself naked in the mirror—once I got all that, there was no turning back.

By the time I decided to say yes to no beer at all, I couldn’t wait to go out to dinner and not order a beer!

For me, saying no to beer means saying yes to my health. The kind of health I want to have in my 30’s (I’ll figure out the health of my 40’s when I get there). By saying no, I also get to say yes to things like: a clear head in the morning; fitting into my jeans and pants and shorts; fitting into my bras (side note—having to get new bras because I’d gained weight was part of what sent me over the edge…bras are not cheap, and especially not the ones that hold weighty bazoombas up with authority); money in my bank account ($5 a beer on average, at 5-10 beers a week—conservatively, that’s $1300/yr); and a smile on my face when I look in the mirror.

But the whole yes/no thing isn’t just limited to my example above. Maybe you’re saying yes to that job you dread going into every day (and maybe saying no to feeling good about your job). Maybe you’re saying yes to the Oreo cookies eying you from the pantry (or maybe you’re saying no to releasing the guilt by taking two instead of one). Could be you’re saying yes to your size [bigger than I’d like them to be] jeans while saying no to size [makes-me-smile-in-the-mirror] jeans. You’re saying yes to [whatever you’re saying yes to] and you’re saying no to [whatever you’re saying no to].

When you say yes to something, you’re always saying no to something else. Maybe even a great many things. What are you saying yes and no to?

*check out how the whole yes/no thing affected one of my amazing clients a few weeks back.

  • Thanks for sharing your beer story. I started saying no to refined sugar back in October. I've slipped back into saying yes in the past few months, but this post reminded me how much I'm saying yes to when I say no to sugar, even though it can be really hard to do. It means saying yes to clear skin, more even moods, better sleep, increased focus to pursue my passions, and feeling truly happy and comfortable in my body. It's amazing that that little, teeny word, no, can open up a whole other world of positivity.

    *Oh, and goodness, thank you for sharing my post here!

  • Thanks for sharing your beer story. I started saying no to refined sugar back in October. I've slipped back into saying yes in the past few months, but this post reminded me how much I'm saying yes to when I say no to sugar, even though it can be really hard to do. It means saying yes to clear skin, more even moods, better sleep, increased focus to pursue my passions, and feeling truly happy and comfortable in my body. It's amazing that that little, teeny word, no, can open up a whole other world of positivity.

    *Oh, and goodness, thank you for sharing my post here!

  • Thanks for sharing your beer story. I started saying no to refined sugar back in October. I've slipped back into saying yes in the past few months, but this post reminded me how much I'm saying yes to when I say no to sugar, even though it can be really hard to do. It means saying yes to clear skin, more even moods, better sleep, increased focus to pursue my passions, and feeling truly happy and comfortable in my body. It's amazing that that little, teeny word, no, can open up a whole other world of positivity.

    *Oh, and goodness, thank you for sharing my post here!

  • Thanks for sharing your beer story. I started saying no to refined sugar back in October. I've slipped back into saying yes in the past few months, but this post reminded me how much I'm saying yes to when I say no to sugar, even though it can be really hard to do. It means saying yes to clear skin, more even moods, better sleep, increased focus to pursue my passions, and feeling truly happy and comfortable in my body. It's amazing that that little, teeny word, no, can open up a whole other world of positivity.

    *Oh, and goodness, thank you for sharing my post here!

  • Thanks for sharing your beer story. I started saying no to refined sugar back in October. I've slipped back into saying yes in the past few months, but this post reminded me how much I'm saying yes to when I say no to sugar, even though it can be really hard to do. It means saying yes to clear skin, more even moods, better sleep, increased focus to pursue my passions, and feeling truly happy and comfortable in my body. It's amazing that that little, teeny word, no, can open up a whole other world of positivity.

    *Oh, and goodness, thank you for sharing my post here!

  • Pingback: Thursday Thought: Change Mindset — Authentic Realities()

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